* From the Geniuses that brought you the North Carolina transgender bathrooms debate….

… now comes the “Lactile Secretions Labeling” regulations.

not milk 3

It seems like just yesterday the National Milk Producers’ “Dairy Pride Act” was slapped to the ground by Congress.  Oh, wait — that was just yesterday.

Led by the fearless Jim Mulhern, the dairy folks spent millions in lobbying and salaries trying to pass their monumentally idiotic national labeling bill in an attempt to define the word “milk.”  The assumption of course was that the public was to damned stupid to know you can’t milk an almond or a soybean, so the masses had to be protected from their own ignorance.

Congress replied to their expensive effort by saying, “Uh, yeah. Nope.”

Having failed at that, Big Dairy came up with a new plan:  Try to find an individual state dumb enough to take up the fight for re-labeling milk.

Enter North Carolina.

After their transgender bath rooms “Shoot-Ourselves-in-the-Foot” tour de farce, the folks in Raleigh decided that the broad condemnation, cancelled conventions, concerts and sporting events was worth a repeat — only this time on something more insipid.

They came up with state legislation to force No. Carolina food processors to re-label products as “not milk” unless they contained the “secretions from a hooved animal.”  Exempted would be moo cows, along with camels, goats and wait for it —  yaks.  We understand the Yak Milk Producers Association of No. Carolina are big supporters of the effort.  Of course their association is comprised entirely of a single yak farmer named Igor who lives in a yurt near Blowing Rock — but whatever.

Stay tuned for more on this developing story.   We’ll be here milking it for all its worth.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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